One of my favourite quotes is by Eleanor Roosevelt. She said,
“All the water in the world cannot drown you unless it gets inside of you.”
I still do this sometimes, but less and less. Now, I’m on a quest to take FULL responsibility for the state of myself at any time, I’m always reminding myself that I have choices. And one of those is to say “Yes” or “No” to whatever anyone else throws my way. If I’m going to be in charge of my state, I need to be in charge of what goes
INTO my state.The man I live with has taught me this. I don’t think I’m alone in having a partner that I sometimes find tricky. If he’s not at his best, he can act a lot like a rhinoceros.
That horn of his can stab.
The thing is, he doesn’t mean to be a rhinoceros, (and most of the time, he isn’t) but my choice is always the same. Do I take his comment in and get hurt or do I just
give him a wide birth until he’s in a less rhinoceros type mood.
As you can imagine, giving him a wide birth is the better strategy. Then, when he’s back to his sweet self, I let myself move in closer again.
So, Eleanor is right. I can only get weighted down when I take in what I shouldn’t.
Which means I can no longer blame anyone for how I feel.
We live in a culture that blames so refusing to blame another for how you feel is a huge step towards personal empowerment. I can’t just be passive and put the responsibility on someone else. I have to take action. And take action I am.
It feels good. Very good.